One of the biggest lessons I have learned through my time in the hospital is that you’re not un-touchable, tomorrow is not guaranteed and at any moment your one shot at life could be gone.  I thought that message had been ground into me deep enough to stay forever, but so quickly I slipped and my focus was changed.  I didn’t realize that I had slipped till about two days ago when some of the main symptoms of low kidney function came on very suddenly and scared me a little bit.

On my check up last year the doctors said that my kidneys weren’t working perfect , but they were working as they expected they would after what happened and there is nothing to be concerned about right now.  Though, most likely they will fail in about ten years.  Although they could fail at any time and there’s nothing that can be done to prevent it. So, I’m just supposed to be conscious of the symptoms.

I won’t lie and say that it’s not scary but, I’m not scared.  If that made any sense:)  My tomorrow is in God’s hands and just because I worry about it doesn’t mean it won’t happen.  Worry isn’t a get out free card sadly.  If worry could have cured me I wouldn’t have gotten so sick.

Having a reminder come on like that was what I needed and It made me think about what I want to do before I die.  I have quite the list of things:) Then I went through that list in my head and then I pulled everything out that God didn’t call me to do.  My list got a lot smaller.  The more I thought about it all the things I thought I wanted to do before I die began to look just so stupid and frivolous beside the things I’ve been called to do.  Life is just so short and although it would be totally cool to have all the members of the DC talk sign my “Jesus Freak” CD it probably won’t happen.  There are just too many things that are of extreme importance to do in this life to just skip over them and fulfil all of my dreams and ideas that weren’t placed there by God.  Every second that you’re alive is for a reason.  I know that God didn’t spare me so I could go waste my life.  I skimmed death and if God doesn’t have a big plan for me then why did He save me?  Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed for any of us.  In fact you could die right now!  Are you ready for that?

“Every second that we have in life is for a reason. If you’re breathing,  It means that there is something left for you to do.  Your life is not an accident.  You have been handpicked and placed on this earth for a purpose.  Your life was chosen.  It’s precious.”  – Paige Omartian  From her book “Wake Up Generation”

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